haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
