I must be too annoying 4 u.
id be glad to
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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