so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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