Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
