Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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