Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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