The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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