Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
