This dress was meant to end up on your floor
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
