Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
They have beer where we have blood.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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