That's intense
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
