Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
