do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
