how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
