i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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