He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
