Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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