Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
What did we do last night that was yellow?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize
