Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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