you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
