this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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