So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
