You made me cry and you don't even care
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
