i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
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