Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry killerkitten hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(919): View more from North Carolina

Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry

Fav 7 1185 2417
share tweet
(+44): View more from England

Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.

Fav 110 1436 13993
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(443): View more from Maryland

Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.

Fav 16 4277 1918
share tweet
(201): View more from New Jersey

at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was

Fav 21 3620 1522
share tweet
(402): View more from Nebraska

I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.

Fav 19 3006 1087
share tweet
(225): View more from Louisiana

Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...

Fav 5 2393 942
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(847): View more from Illinois

All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.

(773): View more from Illinois

that bad?

(847): View more from Illinois

u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.

Fav 3 3098 952
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(978): View more from Massachusetts

She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her

Fav 0 165 247
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(641): View more from Iowa

He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything

Fav 0 54 5
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT