Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
