3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
