my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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