I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
