ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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