ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
