i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
