I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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