He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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