Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
