It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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