I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
