I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
