Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
