we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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