Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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