You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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