Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
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