i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Randomize
