Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
