HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
