rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
