I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
