hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Randomize
