Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
